I've been feeling burdened lately... and it has been bringing me down. I feel like at any point, I'll break in front of everyone, trying to keep that smile =] on my face. I know I'm not suppose to be pretending and hiding, but aren't I suppose to be showing the brighter side to lift others up too?
so you can see my predicament... and everyday that goes by, I ask myself that question. Am I doing the right thing? Am I really glorifying God with what I'm doing?
I look at one side of the situation and I see that pretending and hiding isn't what we are suppose to do. To people and even to myself, it seems like I'm trying to put a FAKEsmile on and run away from my problem. Not wanting to solve what is going on. Pretending to be fine, pretending there is no burden, pretending a smile. just pretending...LIEING...
more questions risen...
Is pretending lieing? Is it lieing when all your doing is trying to think of others before yourself? Isn't it ok to put what you feel aside to lift up the other spirits that are down?
bringing us to the other side of the situation. MY intentions are to put others before myself. I know God gave me the blessing to want to give a helping hand and give advice as best I can. I feel like when I show that I am vulnerable or when I show that I am not happy, it brings others
down. People DO feed off of their surroundings and I want to humble myself and put what I feel aside, to bring others up.
Sooooo...
Are my intentions wrong? Is my reasoning legitimate? It's just confusing and at times, I feel the impatience for answers overcoming me...
BUT I know I need to be patient. Praying for patience everyday and just keeping in my mind that God's timing is always perfect ALWAYS gets me through each day. Even though the storms have pounded at me everyday, Even though tears have fallen every night and Even though my heart breaks always, i remind myself that in the end ALL things work together for the good.
*2 CORINTHIANS 6:4 - 6
_____*John 3:16*
4 comments:
2 Peter 3:9
i love you!
oh btw, it's chmae lol
love you!~ yay! blogger buddies unite! <3333
LUKE1:37
shella, wow. you're right. from the outside looking in, i never would've known. i mean, i guessed it, but only to an extent.
you're right. you're intentions are good, and you say that you're humbling yourself by putting on a smile for everyone else. but in all honesty, i think it would be more humble to show that 'vulnerable' side, too, once in a while. when people see you, more than likely, its not gonna bring them down. they're gonna see that you're human too; that you DO go through things, as well. and at that time, its gonna be their turn to be a blessing to you, just as you were to them.
for example, me. i am so grateful to God that despite our past situation, He allowed me to still have a friend in you. He gave you to me to get me through some rough times. but a relationship is TWO ways. i wanna be there for you, just as you were to me. and i can't do that if you don't let me in, now can i? lol (;
im not saying that you must tell everyone about everything, cos i know you and your history with big, great walls. but i also know the michelle who used to go to me and tell me anything and everything. whether it was serious or just about some guy or even just to have fun.
my point is, you worked mad hard for this friendship to come back, so i hope you realize that it IS back and its here to stay. so maybe one day, you'll be able to come to me again like you used to.
i love you, always & forever babsie (:
<3
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